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By Stephanie Holland; Clare Ward

ISBN-10: 0863880819

ISBN-13: 9780863880810

This name bargains a chance for pros from all backgrounds to improve an realizing of assertiveness. it's a functional operating handbook from that may be utilized the rules of assertiveness.

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Page 19 Handling feelings assertively involves three stages: acknowledgement, disclosure and physical release.  It is easier to admit to joy than to jealousy, but unless we acknowledge for ourselves that the feeling exists, we may not be able to express it honestly and constructively.  Jackie was failing to acknowledge her own jealousy. Disclosure We often assume that people know how we feel, especially in a close relationship; there can be an expectation that one partner knows how the other one is feeling.

Page 37 Nigel arranged a mutually convenient time to meet with Alison in his office.  Instead, make clear, non­judgemental statements.  No matter where it comes, it always has the same effect ­ it releases tension and anxiety and enables the other person to know how we feel.  We need to recognise the value of working out a solution which suits both parties rather than imposing our own ideas on someone else. " Alison explained that her husband had recently left her, leaving her alone to cope with three children.

The pain of that was still with him 23 years later. " We spend a great deal of energy as adults in trying to measure up to others whom we perceive as being more perfect by constantly comparing ourselves with them. Building our self­esteem helps us to overcome the deep­rooted sense of rejection which threatens to overwhelm us each time we receive a criticism.  Asking a group of clients how they usually respond to criticism will often elicit one of the behaviours shown on the table overleaf. " Indirect aggression I don't say anything, I just walk away and sulk.

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Assertiveness : a practical approach by Stephanie Holland; Clare Ward

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